So this is my life?

Apparently I have a lot to say about life -- my life and life in general. I have also been told that my writing and observations can be entertaining and insightful...sometimes. Other times I can just ramble and ramble like a drunken tart who's slumped over her 7th vodka and Sprite of the evening; mascara dripping into her bloodshot eyes; pining over the one who got away. Yeah, it's not always a pretty picture.

So here is my virgin blog on this site. I figure I should tell you a bit about myself to start with.

I am 34, but I still live my life like an 18-year-old. I was recently told by a "friend" that my life is meaningless and I should grow up, get married, buy a house and have children. I don't talk to her much anymore.

I am the person who had an incredible amount of potential, but somehow slipped through the cracks when it came to becomming the person I was meant to be.

If I could live anywhere and do anything? I would live in London and star as Eponine in Les Miserables in the West End. I actually live in New Jersey and write advertising copy...it's all very glamorous and exciting.

My two best friends just married each other. I am in complete awe of them.

Somehow I have become a man repeller. I don't know how and when it happened, but it did. This should actually bother me more than it does. It bothers me at odd moments. Like the other night I was in my bedroom and there was an icky bug on the floor. I had to get rid of it myself. I am tired of doing everything myself. It would just be nice to have someone to get rid of the bugs in my apartment once in a while. (It sounds like I live in an infested dump. I don't. I have a really cute place.) And maybe someone to sit next to me in the dark as we watch horror movies...and when something scary happens I could bury my face in the sleeve of their shirt and catch a faded wiff of their cologne...maybe Obsession...

My idea of "attractive" is not conventional in the least. The more talented or interesting someone is, the hotter they become. For example, I have a school-girl crush on Terry Jones. Yeah, you don't know who he is...he was in Monty Python...and he's like 65-years-old. BUT, he's super-duper smart, went to Oxford and has done a million amazing things.

I also have a major thing for musicians; especially bass players. They are like Kryptonite.

I have an addictive personality. If I like something I want to do it all the time. Which is why I don't gamble and seriously have to watch how often I drink. My addiction is smoking. Horrible, I know. I quit once for like 8 months. I was miserable for 8 months. Then I tried to quit again earlier this year. That didn't work out so well either.

On a positive note, I have identified all the things about my life that I don't like and one by one I am addressing them and turning them around. Some things are much harder than others.

It took me 34 years to realize that I am a work in progress and once I realized that, I became a much happier person.

So there it is...a crash course on the life of Jennifer. Sometimes it's interesting, sometimes it's not, but it's me.