La Familia

I was on the phone yesterday evening with my old neighbor, Marlene. Crazy Julie had called her a few days ago and mentioned that my Nanny had passed away, so Marlene wanted to send her love.

I told her how difficult is has been to get used to the empty spot that has emerged in my family. At times, the feeling overwhelms me and I feel as though I cannot breathe. Marlene explained that loss was so acute because of the closeness that exists in my family and she said she had always been jealous of that.

Huh?

Jealous that someone being removed from the fold has left such a vacancy?

And then I saw her point. Only the deepest of bonds could leave such a feeling of emptiness when it is broken. Would you rather experience that bond and loose it, or never love in that capacity at all?

I choose love.

And I am more grateful than ever for my family. My mother, my brother, my sister, and everyone else. Not every family is a close as we are...some families don't come anywhere near it. I am so incredibly lucky to have these wonderful people in my life.

And even though bonds may break and things may change over the course of time, I wouldn't change a thing. Not one thing.

T'amo.